Falling in love is a wonderful feeling. It comes with the exciting feeling and anticipation of a future filled with love forever. A feeling of been adored, cherished and cared for by somebody simply makes you feel special and some inches taller. At such times you just want to get closer, touch and tell yourselves how much you mean to each other.Love is a feeling but also more than just a feeling. On the feeling aspect , ask yourself, 'is the feeling mutual? Can you boldly say he/she loves you as much as you do? Is the level of love, care, thoughtfulness, sacrifice and dedication to the success of the relationship mutual?
You need to find out this so you don't end up being burnt out. Some people are stressed out because they are always giving into the relationship without receiving as much.
Respect for godly standards and principles must also be mutual. You must both be ready to uphold and maintain the high standard demanded by God in your relationship.
2. Are you ready to stick with this person through thick and thin?
Marriage is more than feelings. It's a decision to be committed to each other. You must be able to say categorically that he/she shows serious signs of a high level of commitment to your success, well being and fulfillment.
Don't fall in love with someone whose level of commitment to you is below or a little higher than average. The level of commitment must be many times over well more than average for you to commit your whole life to such a person.
The issue of purpose is as crucial as the relationship itself. Your purpose is more important than your feelings. Your fulfillment in life supersedes whatever temporary feelings you have. Feelings are fickle and are subject to change under certain situations and circumstances. The guy most understand purpose before proposing love to a lady. If not, he will drag her into his confusion and lack of direction. The lady must know what she is coming to help the guy achieve.
4. Do you have mentors and a common mentor you both defer to?
A life that doesn't respect the place of mentoring will go through unnecessary stress and struggles. Watch out for signs in him/her that disregard the place and authority of mentors. Mentors are not to monitor or control, they are simply to take oversight and give counsel, advice and covering. Trouble proof your relationship by regarding the place of mentors and by submitting to the authority of God's word as the final authority over every issue.
This is probably the most important issue to settle before falling in love. God must be given first place, first priority in the decision of falling in love. Before you get so deeply in love, settle things with God. Don't put the cart before the horse. It makes no sense after all. Pray, ask God specifically. Don't just assume. Don't deceive yourself into thinking God will automatically approve your choice and bless your decision if He has not being involved. Have respect for the covenant. Respect God enough as your father. Give Him the honor of being involved in every detail of your relationship. Allow Him lead you and reveal to you His best for you. Tell God about your feelings from the onset. Wait for Him before you fall deep in love, where it's more difficult to be ruled by how you feel, rather than by what He says. Fall in love with a sense of direction.
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